The “Me”s in Me

Except for the few perfect people I know,
(who will be named below)
most of us are beautiful and prickly at
the same time.  That is, I have a trigger that,
when pulled, reveals the B-me or the P-me.
Example:  When the TV hums in the background
all day, never leaving a News channel, it doesn’t take
long for P-me to appear.  But, when I sit at the computer
and the words fall onto the page, and it all makes sense,
and after reading six times I can find no more typos,
B-me smiles.  It is good.
I guess the issue for me is the “trigger(s)”, the thing or
person that pushes the P or B button in me.
It is so easy to blame something or someone else.
Flip Wilson’s old line:  “The Devil made me do it!”
But blaming someone or something else is a copout.
Like it or not, I choose how I will respond in any given
moment or situation.  I am responsible for my own
behavior, my responses, not you.
You see, I know this, but P-me won’t  go away.
It’s so confusing and frustrating.
My friend Paul wrote me a letter the other day, and
in it he said:  “Wretched man that I am! Who will
rescue me from this (curse within myself)?”
And the next line in the letter surprised and
encouraged me:  “Thanks be to God through
Jesus Christ our Lord.”
Paul and I and many others live with this
“curse” but we also live with the spiritual
incarnation of God.  It’s the curse or the Christ.
Which one do I allow to prevail in my comings and goings?
P-me and B-me will continue to share the same address,
but the God-in-me will become the first responder.
That’s my choice.  I hope for the good sense and
the wisdom to remember, plus the courage to
respond from my greater self.
“Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ my Lord.”